The Boys of Summer

Ever since I was a little kid, I have loved playing the game of baseball. I think I got this love from my dad. I wish someone could have counted the number of pitches he threw to me, the number of grounders and fly balls he at me, and the endless hours of catch we played while I was growing up. I admire my dad’s dedication to us kids, but I know how much he loved the game.

Now I get to be a part of the story. Watching my youngest take to the field is an awesome experience. When he takes to the mound, he reminds me a little of Mark “The Bird” Fidrych. Sometimes, you see him up on the mound with his eyes closed and his lips moving.

We’re never really sure if he is praying, or talking to the ball!

Whatever it is he is doing, it works! He is allowed to pitch two innings maximum, and during his stint, he is usually good for 4 or 5 strikeouts. He then is moved to either third base, shortstop or catcher. I think the kids has a pretty decent arm.

I should tell you about his game-winning 3 RBI’s sometime...

Not Tonight, Dear...

Some things just don’t work out the way we plan them. Appointments get missed, kids get sick, cars break down. Life is, well... life. We can plan all we want (and planning ahead is a good thing!), but ultimately, we are not really in control. We can deceive ourselves into thinking that we are. We can conjure up grand illusions of being important enough or powerful enough to influence the universe, when there are times when we are hardly able to control ourselves...

I had grand plans tonight. I intended to take Candace out for dinner at our favorite little italian bistro. They have great food, a killer wine list and an ambience that screams passionate romance. It is a good place to take the woman of my dreams. We didn’t go. My hurried, rushed, plate-spinning life appeared seamless and smooth, but I was neglecting the important fine china. Instead of a night out, it was a night in... kids doing school work, fire in the hearth, a bottle of Zin breathing in the bottle and glasses...

All the great stuff out there is really not much to speak of when we really look at it. Most of those plates deserve to crash to the ground. Everything I have ever wanted is in this very room. We laughed, we cried, we listened to beautiful music from our children’s fingertips.

How is that for some scattered thoughts?

Running on Empty

Well? I am about tapped out. Pretty surprising how much resilience I seem to have lost in the last year. There is this principle that the more water you pour out of a jug, the more you need to refill if you are to keep it ready pour out again. Someone else compared it to breathing... you have to breathe in before you can breathe out. I’m out of breath. I feel like I am a fish on dry land... I know what I am supposed to do, but somehow, I just flop around with the water just a few feet away.

I have been waking up a lot during the night hours. Sometimes I have nightmares that are straight out of a horror movie... real slasher films... and other times I just sit bolt-upright without anything to distract me or cause me to wake. I usually get up and grab a bowl of Cheerios and have a cup of chamomile tea while I read from my Bible. The calm of the night is the best time to read, I find. Odd how I find comfort and disturbance in the same place and time.

I suspect the feeling of being out of breath, the nightmares and the times of sleeplessness have something in common.

I’m looking forward to July.

Kevie Needs a Holiday

Seriously... The brain has not been working all that well lately. Too much going on Too many tasks, appointments, meetings...
I need a holiday. I am a fried egg.

And So It Begins (Again)...

So what in the world is going on?

I’ll tell you...